Belonging to the past

Flashbacks hurt my soul once more,
Surprisingly so, once more.
Never thought I would come back
To something as cruel as that,
Never thought I would review it
No surveillance, never knew it.
Why, it hurts so much right now
Many years down the line,
Why, it hurts my soul to know
That humane was never there
On these cruel people's minds.
It was never on their minds
How they could dehumanise
Another human trying
To become much more
Another human crying,
To be left alone.

A human, yes, who maybe had lost her plot
But had found an inner light
Which never had shined so bright.

And yes, I was distracted,
Unhinged, demented, crazed
But brutal was
to hold me down
with chains
made out
of human hands,
who seized me and constrained me
Even when a human was talking back to them
In words...

Sacred are words,
But tainted were the fleshy chains,
Tainted and dark
And of the Underworld.
Which sought constraints
Of my body
But oh, my soul was being hurt instead,
Broken, already feeling lost,
Bleeding, already having bled.

A broken spirit was I then,
And one would have to wonder,
Did I ever fully come back
Patched up,
Or still am walking limping,
Still trying to escape a force
invisibly impinging
on my core?
A force which belongs to the past,
But that lives on,
In my heart?